Fake Dems, faux Dems, whatever ... they're gems

4/7/2005

So, Democrats are eating their own again.

Late last week, citing party disloyalty, the Lucas County party's executive committee "sanctioned" 11 Dems.

I've since heard this described as a "●' and the horse you rode in on' action."

Normally, I'd list everyone sanctioned, but (1) their names were already reported, plus (2) I only get 15 inches, and spelling out seven City Council and four school board members takes up precious space.

Suffice it to say, it's yet another skirmish between the A Team and the B Team.

And no, I'm not going to explain that.

If you're from out of town, and are now bewildered, then my apologies. But the fact is, it's just too complicated. (See: space limitations, described above.)

You had to be there, you know what I mean?

Anyhoo, as reported in our pages:

"The sanctions ban officeholders from receiving any support from the party or its organizations, including financial donations, use of party headquarters, and use of volunteers. They will not appear on party literature and will not be otherwise recognized."

So the affected Democrats are being shunned, and who knew that we had elected so many Amish people into office?

Of course, it's won't be too hard to endure sanctions when you've got company. It's like being sent to your room by your parents - along with everyone else in your playgroup.

As political reporter Fritz Wenzel subsequently reported, a possible movement is under way to create another official branch of Lucas County Democrats, despite the fact that it looks as if unifying Democrats has much in common with herding cats.

Still, you've got admire a strategy that would codify the

A Team/B Team factionalism that apparently started long before anyone even thought to drain the Great Swamp.

Can you imagine the fund-raiser invitations?

You are cordially invited to the Lucas County Democratic Party's annual Jiggs Dinner in March.

Please note: We are the REAL Democrats, not faux Dems, so be prepared to contribute accordingly. RSVP to Jack Wilson.

Or, how about this one?

You are cordially invited to the Democratic Party's Annual Big-Ticket fund-raiser dinner in October.

Please note: We are LEGITIMATE Democrats, not wannabe Dems, so be prepared to contribute accordingly. RSVP to anyone who doesn't have a key to the Madison Avenue so-called "headquarters."

When I asked treasurer-elect Wade Kapszukiewicz about the progress of an "alternative" party organization yesterday, he took advantage of the occasion to showcase his dance skills.

"I think it's premature to talk in terms of being an organization," he said, waltzing gracefully, "but on the other hand, I think there are a lotta people, a lotta Democrats, who've been turned off by the scorched-earth policies of the [current leadership's] hate slate."

God, how I love this town.