Article published June 14, 2003
25 DENOMINATIONS PROFILED
Lost sheep can flock to new guide
Author shares her church-search experiences
Carmen Renee Berry lost her cynicism and found a spiritual home.
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THE BLADE
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By DAVID YONKE
BLADE RELIGION EDITOR
If you're shopping for a car, there are dozens of books, magazines, and Web sites that offer all the information you want and then some - from road tests to reliability to comfort ratings. The same wealth of data is available when it comes to making many of life's decisions, from buying toaster ovens to choosing colleges.
But what if you're looking for a church?
When Carmen Renee Berry began searching for a new spiritual home, she was disappointed to find that the only written information available came from encyclopedias and church handbooks - and they were either "pretty boring or confusing," she said in a recent interview.
So Ms. Berry, author of the best-selling book Girlfriends, took off on a quest to sort through "the 1.29816 gazillion" Christian denominations to find the church that best fit her needs.
First, she made a list of what she wanted in a church, studying its history, doctrine, government, music, prayer, and worship styles. Next, she spent more than a year doing research and visiting churches belonging to about 25 different denominations. Finally, she made her personal choice (which led her back to the denomination in which she was reared, the Church of the Nazarene).
Ms. Berry, 50, of Sierra Madre, Calif., decided she would use her experience and observations - and her sharp sense of humor - to help other lost sheep by compiling her research in the newly published book, The Unauthorized Guide to Choosing a Church (Brazos Press, $18.99).
"Seeking a spiritual community is one of the most significant decisions you can make in life," Ms. Berry said. "The better informed you are about the Christian faith, and about the history, views, and practices of specific denominations, the more wisely the choice can be made."
The first decision is whether to attend any church, she said. Ms. Berry had doubts for a long time and had stopped attending for about five years.
"It's easy to become cynical and critical, but what does that do for you?" she asked.
Then one of her good friends committed suicide, shaking her up and sending her in search of a spiritual community.
Despite humanity's penchant to create "elaborately tiered, contentious institutions that require enormous efforts to maintain," Jesus defined the Christian church in its purest form: "Wherever two or three come together in my name, there I am with them (Matt. 18:20)," Ms. Berry writes.
After realizing that "my faith does not flourish in isolation," she said she managed to look beyond the foibles and flaws of the church and its members. "Even though at times other Christians can be quite annoying," she writes, "I feel very fortunate to have found my way back to a spiritual community that puts up with me even when I'm a bit annoying myself."
One of the first steps in using The Unauthorized Guide to Choosing a Church is to assess one's personal needs. Ms. Berry put together a lengthy checklist that covers 10 key topics including: how does one view God, Jesus, and the Holy Spirit? Is the Bible the inspired Word of God or a collection of stories and myths? Do you prefer traditional hymns or contemporary music? Do you prefer a small, medium, or mega-sized church?
Ms. Berry said everybody has different criteria and "nonnegotiable" items, which, for her, included a church that ordains women.
She then gives a brief overview of the denominations' histories before delving into details about each of the 25 groups.
"Basically there was one church until about the year 1050, when there was the first division between the Catholic and the Orthodox churches," Ms. Berry said." Then there was the Reformation of the 1500s and everything went crazy after that."
The book is informative but never weighty, with a lot of facts and fast-flowing overviews as well as a few amusing side notes. It includes, for example, a list of "Top 10 Signs You Are in the Wrong Church," such as: "There is an ATM in the lobby," and, "The church bus has gun racks."
She offers some serious advice on how to spot churches that commit "spiritual abuse."
"It could be a pastor or a Sunday school teacher who is controlling and presents themselves in such a way that it damages somebody else's faith. Some people who say, `I'm not going to church because it's full of hypocrites' have probably been spiritually abused in some way. Somebody has violated their trust."
At its most basic, The Unauthorized Guide to Choosing a Church can save readers time and energy.
"I don't think we've been taught how to look for a church," Ms. Berry said. "You don't usually walk up to a church and ask someone, `What are all your beliefs and history?' Most people spend more time checking out a video camera they're going to buy than the church they go to."
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