Sandy, Carty take bow on unreality TV

Hey, wait a second, people. Where's my consulting fee?

I hear TV consultants make big bucks advising news anchors to change personalities and/or hair color, or telling station managers to switch from “Live at Five!” to “Double Doppler Weather Predictor!”

On second thought, I was only joking last fall when I suggested one of WTVG, Channel 13's competitors would do well to scoop up the newly dethroned Sandy Isenberg, who could then wrestle for ratings with Carty Finkbeiner, the former Toledo mayor who was noticeably unemployed until he resurfaced at WTVG as something the broadcast industry likes to call “on-air talent.”

Gee.

Makes you feel kind of sorry for all those young, hopeful broadcast journalism majors, doesn't it? They go off to school and study hard, while it turns out a more direct route to getting planted before the camera is to slide out of political office through term limits (Carty) or voter initiative (Sandy). Ms. Isenberg, you might recall, was president of the Lucas County Commissioners until voters decided otherwise, thereby ending a long and legendary local political career.

You might also recall I once referred to Ms. Isenberg as She Who Must Be Obeyed, which I abbreviated to SWMBO. I think Sandy must have liked it, since I heard her pronounce herself “swambo” on a number of public occasions. Personally, I'm glad to see SWMBO back in the public spotlight, if for no other reason than I really hate to see a fitting nickname squandered.

But in this format?

I assumed some other Toledo TV station would pick up on the politico-as-commentator gimmick. Who imagined Channel 13 might simply add another former politician to its stable, and then have 'em square off in a two-minute debate?

Sheer genius. Yet, I ask you: A two-minute debate? Good luck! Neither Carty nor Sandy ever earned a reputation for brevity. Both of them are people who (a) really like to hold the floor, and (b) don't take kindly to interruptions, if you know what I mean.

Last night was the first broadcast of the so-called “BackTalk” segment pitting Him against Her, this time discussing expansion plans for Franklin Park Mall. (Excuse me. What I meant to say, of course, was Westfield Shoppingtown Franklin Park, although someone really ought to break it to their marketing people that there's no such word as “shoppingtown.”)

In yesterday's Blade, WTVG's news director discussed the likelihood of making the debate between Carty and Sandy a regular segment, but conceded he was a little worried there may be too few differences between them. After all, both are Democrats (which, in this day and age, seems to mean Republican Lite, but never mind).

Regardless, Channel 13's general manager said WTVG is “trying to find a vehicle” for Sandy, which I think is shrewd. Darned shrewd. That way, the station still gets to keep an ex-pol doing commentary. It also gets to begin production of its highly anticipated “infotainment” program, one that takes full advantage of today's hottest TV trend - the reality show.

Aw, you know the show I mean. Everyone around town is whispering about it! It's the one where WTVG cameras follow the every move of a former mayor as once again he battles (as only he can battle) for the hearts and minds of voters.